Diary of A Plus Size Beauty

Saturday 3rd October 2015

There is nothing much going on. I think I'll spend my day at home waiting for Mututho hours when I can drink myself silly. Wait a minute, what is this I have just seen? Ati Njoki Chege wrote hit the 'jim' on her online post? Hahahah!! Because gym is the hardest word in the world to spell. She corrected it, but I retweeted that tweet with that screenshot so if you want to see it, just look at my recent feed. So she's talking about women being fat. She's not even trying to be polite about it. Hmmm...okay. So much hate was in that post. It made me wonder if she once was 'fat' and had been given heat for it, and now that she is a size 0 (as if!) she was making a come back. Oh, the ignorance in that post! She thought that she would put plus size women down by pointing out all the negatives. I will not delabour this issue further because very many have addressed it. However, I do understand that this writer wanted controversy, and she wanted to be on people's lips. She got her wish. Let's see what she comes up with next weekend to remain relevant. I'm just hoping the young, impressionable minds who were unlucky enough to read that article do not believe a word she says.

Sunday 4th October 2015

I met an auntie of mine who had not seen me in a while. I'm sure you know those aunts. It is like they have communion with the devil so that they come torment God's children on earth. I do not mean to be so harsh, but really, are their lives so miserable that they have to pass on their foul mood to everyone they meet. I know misery loves company, but you will not spoil my mood. She gave me a compliment which wasn't one really, because she mentioned something about me not being in a position to run during that competition in 2006 but now she could see a waistline in my mtumba dress. Yeah, I know I do not wear Clavin Klein and my handbag may say Dolce and Gababbna but really?! Is it so hard for you to say I look beautiful and even more so now that I lost a few inches. It's alright. Whatever makes you happy. I will not let your opinion of me become my reality. Why as women do we pull each other down instead of pulling each other up? I will just make sure I never make a person second guess themselves no matter the situation.

Monday 5th October 2015

I am walking down the street. You know that one that I don't like. The one I avoid because there is that guy who will see me and ask for coffee. Please do not ask me how I got myself into this unfortunate situation. It is a long story which I could cut short but don't really want to narrate.  I have to keep my eyes forward as I walk and make sure that I do not look to the left or else he will see me. Pheeew! He didn't see me. But my dress keeps riding up my hips exposing my thighs. I did not wear panty hose today. So I'm treating the whole of Nairobi to the eye candy that are my thighs. Can you really blame me? The only stockings I can get that will fit my length and hips cost a fortune, and my current financial situation will not allow me to indulge in such luxury. Yes, I am a pitiable soul, but please do enjoy the view! Eerrrm...excuse me, did that guy who just passed by me whisper something in my ear? Maybe I'm just imagining things. As I cross to another street, I hear yet another whisper. "Beautiful.." I think he said. Okay, now I'm crazy! How in God's name am I hearing these things? Am I that vain that I think every guy that passes me is whispering compliments? Okay, maybe I am...but still...

Tuesday 6th October 2015

Today, it is like the universe conspired against me, and decided to throw away my clothes. Why? I have nothing to wear. I have an interview to go to, and I want to make the best of impressions. I do want the job, but I don't want them to think I'm poor. And then again I have lunch with Bae...hahaha! I don't call him that. Loool! I just thought I'd use that word once in my life. Was the person who came up with that word dyslexic? Perhaps he tried to spell beautiful and for the life of him, he could not figure out whether it was the 'a' or 'e' that came first so he just left it at that..lol! As I look into my wardrobe and find absolutely nothing to wear, I take a walk to my full length mirror. There I am, standing in my bra and panties, and I realise that if I keep my arms raised, I actually look like I have a flat stomach. I laugh quietly to myself and lower my arms sucking in my stomach. "It would be so awesome if my stomach were this flat..." I think to myself. I let out my stomach and realise that my stomach  is not as big as I make it to be. Besides, I'm healthy, and that's all that matters. If you want to know what I finally decided to wear, just know it was a big mistake and my hips will never ever lie. *sigh

Wednesday 7th October 2015

My waist trainer has arrived! Finally!!! Now I can have the Kim K ass and waist I have been drooling over all this while. So I am rocking a dress today. Blue is my favourite colour, so you best believe I have a blue dress. With this waist trainer thingie my stomach will be unnoticed through the dress and my ass will look nice and firm. I admire myself in the mirror. I really do look good! Vanity is a key accessory to be able to live this life. So there is this man who enters the mat I'm in and he takes the seat next to me. He does not sit in an ordinary fashion: he makes sure that as he sits, his hips brushed mine. I wondered whether this was his tactic of 'vybing' chics. From the corner of my eye, I could see that he was looking at me. He reached out a hand and said hallo. I am from the county where women are known for not shaking hands. I almost looked at him with disdain and ignored that handshake. But I was in a good mood, so I indulged him. He was holding his iPhone 6, white and gold in his hands, and I wondered whether it was really necessary to show off that phone in the mat in Ngara. I am not one to judge,though. He probably knows something about the security in that place that I don't, so I'll just ignore that bit. Of course he is from that community from the western part of Kenya. The ones who are known for their lavish spending and lifestyles. They seem to be the only ones who love and appreciate plus size beauties. Within a short span of the mat weaving through traffic from Globe into town, I had already known that the guy is doing a masters degree, and he will soon afterwards get into a PHD programme or what others like to call "Permanent Head Damage" as soon as he is through with his masters. He wasted no time in asking for my number. In fact, he gives me his phone to put on my number. Crap! I have to put in my real number because he will dial immediately. Whatever maayn! All I have to keep doing is ignore his texts and calls. What are the chances of me bumping into him ever again? Slim to none? I'll take that chance. Thanks for the ego boost though...now Bae's got to know that if he does not treat me right, I'll get someone who can. Who am I kidding? I love that man too much! 

I know I am not so good at keeping this journal, but I promise I will keep writing. Perhaps one day the events on here would be turned into a movie or series...lol! Until next time dear Diary.