Being Single in Today's World

Being single in this day and age is the hardest, most painful thing to endure. Why? You may ask. I'll tell you. Technology is all around us. Gone are the days people used to wait around their houses for the neighbourhood photographers  to pass by and take their photographs; and wait yet another week or so for them to develop so as to either frame or put in an album. Today, all you have to do is whip out your phone, flick open the camera app and snap away. Front cameras have made taking photographs of yourself much easier. Although there are those people who would still rather stand in front of a mirror for the perfect photograph. You may wonder where this rant is headed. Let me go straight to the point.

When you are single, it is like the universe conspires against you to bring you photographs of your friends and/or family who are in happy relationships. Whether they are actually happy relationships is neither here nor there, but you get my point. It gets even worse when your childhood friend posts a photograph with a person who you have had a crush on since you were old enough to know its meaning, with the caption #bae #togetherforever and all manner of hashtags that couples in love can put together. Of course you will like the picture because they do look good together, and you never really had the courage to mention that you liked them, so you swallow the bitter pill of jealousy and switch to another social media site.

That does not do you any good either. You find that you have been invited to a wedding of your former school mate who was your age last you remembered. You keep a mental note of the date as you click on their profile to see who they are getting hitched to. You do not call it snooping. It isn't really. You just want to know who their beau is and perhaps, if you are lucky they shall have posted where they met and maybe you can get an idea of where you can be hanging out to meet your potential spouse. Unfortunately, they are quite private on that front, and when you realise that you won't be getting any more information on them, you see a notification on a new photo that has been uploaded.

You click on it, and you hold back the urge to scream out loud, because the people around you might think you have a loose nut, so you bite your lip and stare at the screen. You even rub your eyes, forgetting your eye make up  blink twice to ensure your eyes are not deceiving you. So it turns out that your friend who is two years younger, has just been proposed to and is set to marry within the year. You think back to the hopeless relationships you've had in the past and you silently ask God why He is being unfair. Really God? Really? I know I'm not an angel but seriously! Is this how my life is supposed to be?

God really does have a sense of humour. Here you are, surrounded by happy young couples in love, yet your last relationship you realised was just a sham, because the guy forgot to tell you he had a baby mama! Even your baby cousin has a 'girlfriend' he takes biscuits to. Hahaha! It is actually quite laughable. You think that maybe just maybe, you standards are raised a tad too high. So you may need to review them. But then again, there are some pointers on that list that are non-compromisable. Is that even a word? Lol. Even your English vocabulary is getting rusty. There are some pointers on that list that you cannot compromise. Much better. Your English teacher did not waste her time on you. 

You have read all the books ever written on relationships, okay almost all of them, and you still cannot remember ever being in a relationship that meant something. You resign your fate to being a side-dish now that TV series make them sound so enticing that they look like the solution to world peace! But no! You cannot be a mpango wa kando because your mother raised you better. Besides, you tell yourself, you are still young. You still are not earning enough money for you to start thinking about settling down. You are not thinking of settling down, you tell your mind; you want a special someone who can make you laugh, one who does not mind your craziness, and who actually sees your sense of humour.

Then you tell yourself to snap out of it. You are allowing yourself to brew a cup of tea in this pity party and it does not make you feel any better. Neither does it get you your somebody special. Typical! So you go back to social media and like the pictures of those couples you see who look happy. You like their photographs with the peace that one day the picture garnering that many like will be that of you and your love. You suddenly do not feel so bad about your situation. The promise that your person is on the way is what keeps you going. You tell yourself that this person is not coming to complete you but to compliment you. Together you will be a force that people will see and envy. Up until your Special person comes, keep sending the love to the couples you see. Enjoy being single; you'll miss it when your person finds you.