Of Men who Sulk
I never in a million years would have thought that I would write a post about this, but it seems the story of men who sulk is a reality we have to come to terms with, just like we did our sorry excuse of our country's internal security personnel.
By now you must be wondering what this is grown men with a beard are sulking about, so I will get right to it- Rejection by the female species. I will begin by painting a step by step analysis of how this guy operates so that if you are a chic you are aware, and if you are a dude, you check yourself.
By now you must be wondering what this is grown men with a beard are sulking about, so I will get right to it- Rejection by the female species. I will begin by painting a step by step analysis of how this guy operates so that if you are a chic you are aware, and if you are a dude, you check yourself.
1. Eye Candy
For some reason, this type of guy has a good looking face. So when you see him, you are struck by something- it could be his eyes, his lips, or just his skin. He may be no Denzel, but he sure as hell ain't no Kevin Hart! Again, his height and size are just right. So no wonder the ladies like to be around him. He is an earthly Adonis-almost perfect. He likes this feminine attention he is getting, so he is in no hurry to make it go away. Woe unto you if you happen to get that "coveted" title of girlfriend. You will sing a song...one like Taylor Swift's Teardrops on my guitar.
2. He likes and gets what he sees
This guy is either a last born or a mummy's boy; so he always gets what he likes. We all know why the middle class do not like shopping with toddlers. They do not have "No" or "Not now" their vocabulary. If they do not have their way, they throw a tantrum. Now this gentleman, is like that four year old child.
He likes a girl, so he begins his hunt like a lion eyeing his prey. He will do all he can to win this girl over.
This guy is either a last born or a mummy's boy; so he always gets what he likes. We all know why the middle class do not like shopping with toddlers. They do not have "No" or "Not now" their vocabulary. If they do not have their way, they throw a tantrum. Now this gentleman, is like that four year old child.
He likes a girl, so he begins his hunt like a lion eyeing his prey. He will do all he can to win this girl over.
3. Does his homework
This guy may have read that book on understanding women that has never been published. Why? He knows just what to say and how to say it. He may have those awkward slips of the tongue, but that will not happen too often, because he will be off his game, and that is a no-no. If the girl is a bookworm, he will have the right conversation for her. If she loves to go out, he will conform to her lifestyle. Better for him if she is an introvert, because he will have the best suggestion as to how nice it would be to watch the sunset from his balcony or some intimate nonsense like that. And do you know what, every type of girl no matter how cautious she is, will fall in like with this guy. He is a gentleman with good manners, puts her needs before his. He makes Sauti Sol look like amateurs when he serenades a girl with his words. This is because he captures that one thing that brings her sanity- the mind.
This guy may have read that book on understanding women that has never been published. Why? He knows just what to say and how to say it. He may have those awkward slips of the tongue, but that will not happen too often, because he will be off his game, and that is a no-no. If the girl is a bookworm, he will have the right conversation for her. If she loves to go out, he will conform to her lifestyle. Better for him if she is an introvert, because he will have the best suggestion as to how nice it would be to watch the sunset from his balcony or some intimate nonsense like that. And do you know what, every type of girl no matter how cautious she is, will fall in like with this guy. He is a gentleman with good manners, puts her needs before his. He makes Sauti Sol look like amateurs when he serenades a girl with his words. This is because he captures that one thing that brings her sanity- the mind.
3. The Good Time
For that girl who likes current affairs, but not too much of it, she will be kept glued to her seat, because this man knows his stuff! He will mix in questions of what her favourite movies are, and what she does for fun. The way these questions are asked, when compared to that douche on Facebook who asks, " Una park wapi?" or " "Tell me everything about you," makes this guy look like Mr. Right; and he usually is, just for that time when he is biding his time. Within no time, he has offered to take this girl to see a movie he thinks they will both like. Since he is paying ( What a gentleman!) The girl agrees to go. This is the first date so he will not try anything stupid. The date will end with him walking the girl to her stop, and wishing her a lovely night.
For that girl who likes current affairs, but not too much of it, she will be kept glued to her seat, because this man knows his stuff! He will mix in questions of what her favourite movies are, and what she does for fun. The way these questions are asked, when compared to that douche on Facebook who asks, " Una park wapi?" or " "Tell me everything about you," makes this guy look like Mr. Right; and he usually is, just for that time when he is biding his time. Within no time, he has offered to take this girl to see a movie he thinks they will both like. Since he is paying ( What a gentleman!) The girl agrees to go. This is the first date so he will not try anything stupid. The date will end with him walking the girl to her stop, and wishing her a lovely night.
4. The Gentleman
Technology with all the apps available are not applicable at this time. Even with the high calling rates of the bitter option, he will call every once in a while to 'check in'. The interesting bit of all this is that all this while, it is not clear what this interaction is.
Technology with all the apps available are not applicable at this time. Even with the high calling rates of the bitter option, he will call every once in a while to 'check in'. The interesting bit of all this is that all this while, it is not clear what this interaction is.
5. Pay up
6. Jifanye hujui
On the D-day, he will spruce up his crib. Not that it ever gets dirty, but because there is a lady coming over, everything has to be just perfect. Since the invite was made for daytime, the girl will not suspect a thing. A knock on the door and a hug later, the two are on the couch watching the movie. The movie ends and all that the guy has done is offer her food, drinks and what nots. When he sees his time is running out, he will do either one of two things:
On the D-day, he will spruce up his crib. Not that it ever gets dirty, but because there is a lady coming over, everything has to be just perfect. Since the invite was made for daytime, the girl will not suspect a thing. A knock on the door and a hug later, the two are on the couch watching the movie. The movie ends and all that the guy has done is offer her food, drinks and what nots. When he sees his time is running out, he will do either one of two things:
i) Feign worry about her safety and offer to walk her to the stage so she can pick a ma3 home. This is so that he can get a chance to give her that intoxicating hug men are known to give so that girls gets confused; and he has a chance to kiss her. Depending on how good the kiss is, he will score, so this has to work.
ii) Ask if she would like a hard drink, that is if she had not started taking it, and if she were, give a refill. This is just to set the mood, so that as he stretches his arm towards the seat over her shoulder, and tries to kiss the girl, she is too tipsy to refuse.
The only problem is that not all girls are the same. That girl he picked up the previous night for a quickie is not the same one he has here in his room. This is a lady who had just honoured an invitation to hang out. And all of a sudden, the guy is turning her into an FWB.
The obvious thing for the girl, regardless of which plan he executes, is to not give in to his advances. Even when he is trying to carry her to his bed, and his hard on is pressing onto her outer thigh, she will not agree; as that was not part of the bargain. He is persistent. The girl will threaten to hit him with that bottle of alcohol he brought for her, and that is what brings him back to his senses. He reluctantly lets go of her, and offers to escort her to the bus stop. Even though she had planned to sleep over, that idea is lost, because this man's ego has been bruised. With a cold hug she is sent on her way from whence she came.
The only problem is that not all girls are the same. That girl he picked up the previous night for a quickie is not the same one he has here in his room. This is a lady who had just honoured an invitation to hang out. And all of a sudden, the guy is turning her into an FWB.
The obvious thing for the girl, regardless of which plan he executes, is to not give in to his advances. Even when he is trying to carry her to his bed, and his hard on is pressing onto her outer thigh, she will not agree; as that was not part of the bargain. He is persistent. The girl will threaten to hit him with that bottle of alcohol he brought for her, and that is what brings him back to his senses. He reluctantly lets go of her, and offers to escort her to the bus stop. Even though she had planned to sleep over, that idea is lost, because this man's ego has been bruised. With a cold hug she is sent on her way from whence she came.
7. Ignore Ignore Ignore
Remember how in Scandal, when Cy told the First Lady that he will out her because of her involvement with Defiance, she said she would deny deny deny?
After a rejection of that sort, this man ceases to acknowledge your very existence! You may as well walk stark naked, and he will not even look at you long enough to tell you to put on clothes. You will be a statistic. That girl who refused him.
Remember how in Scandal, when Cy told the First Lady that he will out her because of her involvement with Defiance, she said she would deny deny deny?
After a rejection of that sort, this man ceases to acknowledge your very existence! You may as well walk stark naked, and he will not even look at you long enough to tell you to put on clothes. You will be a statistic. That girl who refused him.
8. Truth
We had earlier mentioned that he had not marked territory, so you as the girl are left wondering what it is you did wrong. Truth is, you were that girl whose values cannot be shaken. You do not need that kind of negative energy around you. You may have felt heart broken because you thought you saw something. Unfortunately, men can fake a relationship for an orgasm. Never feel bad that you never got a chance with that guy. You dodged a bullet. He never cared enough for you to even call you his chic and he expected you to lay it all for him. Thank God you did not yield to the pressure; because it is better for him to hate you than for you to hate yourself.
We had earlier mentioned that he had not marked territory, so you as the girl are left wondering what it is you did wrong. Truth is, you were that girl whose values cannot be shaken. You do not need that kind of negative energy around you. You may have felt heart broken because you thought you saw something. Unfortunately, men can fake a relationship for an orgasm. Never feel bad that you never got a chance with that guy. You dodged a bullet. He never cared enough for you to even call you his chic and he expected you to lay it all for him. Thank God you did not yield to the pressure; because it is better for him to hate you than for you to hate yourself.
9. Get over himself
With time, his pride will make him remember that you are breathing the same oxygen, which will cause him to be civil towards you. Of course by then you will have moved on, so whether or not he talks to you is neither here nor there. The good thing is, he will look at your face with that beautiful smile, and wish he did things differently. But it is too late. You moved on. You hold no grudge against him, but you and him cannot be an item. Not even if he were the last man on earth. and you know what, by then you are free.
With time, his pride will make him remember that you are breathing the same oxygen, which will cause him to be civil towards you. Of course by then you will have moved on, so whether or not he talks to you is neither here nor there. The good thing is, he will look at your face with that beautiful smile, and wish he did things differently. But it is too late. You moved on. You hold no grudge against him, but you and him cannot be an item. Not even if he were the last man on earth. and you know what, by then you are free.
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